aaaaaaaaaaaand scene...

August 4, 2011


Ever feel like there is a competition for "heavens academy awards" going on when you step into Christian circles? When the question arises "so, how are you?" The responses are staggering.."oh, I am so BLESSED!" "God has just poured out BLESSING on me this week" "Everything is just wonderful! Couldn't be better!" "I am just going to break my face from smiling so much.. I am just so HAPPY and doing so GREAT!"
Wow, I am at a loss of what to do.. do I stand and clap or run away because my week was not so stepford wifish? I really am confused. These ARE the same people I talk to during the week right? These are the same people who a few days earlier were telling me about their crappy jobs and their struggles and pains and even the ones who were bad mouthing other people.. right? I mean ... I AM in the right place.. no? I am confused. We are so salty and lightly IN church yet, it seems sometimes we are not that way OUTSIDE of the church walls. It is backwards no?
I am a control freak. There, I said it. I like to be in control of what is going on. I like to know what is going to happen and when. I then like to be the one who is telling other people what is going on and when. It is pretty hard for me to let go of this. Here's the thing..If GOD is in control why do we freak out about the little things? I find myself getting flustered about things that in the grand scheme are controlled by Him. Psssst....We all do it..we all pretend that we don't.. we all think that if we act like we have no control issues or struggles that this makes us more "spiritual"..well, I am here to tell you I am NOT that "spiritual" I struggle.. which is good.. because if I had it all together I would not have any need for God.I am so glad HE holds me together.
There seems to be a lack of genuine yearning for God. It seems that we apply a mask to our problems instead of applying GOD to them. It is a funny thing, but when GOD is applied to our struggles, hurts, situations we are not in any way responsible for it. We HAVE to give over control. Which means the bragging rights are HIS not ours. Which means that all the "oh, I am just fine" has to melt away. The times that God has used me the most are the times I have been humbled enough to admit a struggle to another person and then share with them the power of GOD and the power of CHANGE in my life. It never ceases to amaze me to see GOD do the work... and me not to take the credit.

It is so important for us to be REAL. It is so important because if we just pretend we are all right we are allowing pride and self to rule and not God. We are allowing our need to please OTHERS over ride our call to please God. It is funny, we think that all the charades are pleasing to God, when He sees our hearts and longs to know them.

So, I am now tearing up my acceptance speech for the "church Oscars" and giving back the chocolate filled statuesque. thank you.

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